Wednesday, November 3, 2010

Blogs and the Men Who Read Them.

Since receiving multiple comments on multiple blogs here at R.J. that have surprised me, I figured I ought to write an entry dedicated to those commentators who are obviously reading this blog - much to my surprise - and definitely NOT to my chagrin.

These readers are men.  Men of all ages.  Men of all colors and creeds. 

While my facebook readership indicates that most of my readers are indeed women, and this blog is obviously catered to them and their needs, thoughts, feelings, etc, I have noted that when I least expect it, it's the men on this blog who get involved in the comments, send the encouragement, "like" the links, and give the most feedback.

I find this really interesting considering the content matter usually posted around here, so I decided to ask some of my male friends who generally read this blog why.  Why in the world do you read here?  Why are you interested? 

Some of my male friends read my blog to support me, as a friend.  I read their stuff about physical endurance and dadhood and eating contests and they support me in much the same way.  We're friends and fellow writers and bloggers and so we share and support one another. 

But the vast majority of men I asked didn't have that whole "you're my friend and we're both writers and I'm trying to support you" excuse. 

The vast majority of the men I asked were genuinely interested in the content.

"You give this window into what my [wife/girlfriend/daughter] might need, and might not be able to voice, and I really appreciate that."

"I want my daughters to read your posts.  I read them and send them to my daughters."

"It gives me this insight into female psyche.  We're really clueless about what you guys are thinking, and this is helpful to me when I'm trying to figure something out."

"I want to be supportive of the causes you support.  You show me the another way of thinking.  Give me the reasons behind things that I wouldn't otherwise understand."

"I'm mostly curious about what's going on inside your head.  Someone like you, I mean - not specifically you."

I get a lot of notes from men who thank me for writing this stuff so their daughters can read it.

Those are the notes that mean the most, to be honest. 

I think that the audience I always think about when I'm writing it me when I was fourteen or fifteen years old.  I know that there are times when I talk about motherhood or marriage and those posts might not seem so relevant - same with this post - but thinking back to my 9th and 10th grade self - they really are.  They are relevant.

I kept my diary from back then.  OY.  But it really gets me thinking about what goes on in our minds when we're young.  When we feel so old.  And let's face it - today you're the oldest you've ever been - so chew on that awhile.  You never really think you'll grow up.  You think ABOUT growing up, but you never think you'll get there.

So - long story short - I'm glad dads are reading this and steering their daughter's in this direction.

I'm also glad that there are men out there who are supportive of their wives and girlfriends and daughters and sisters and moms.  And who are making an effort to learn more about us and what we're thinking and what we might need.  I'm thankful for the dads who are reading and praying for their little girls.  The dads who are dancing with their daughters at their weddings and the dads who are thinking about it and getting all teary eyed.

I guess when it comes right down to it - it makes sense that men would be reading this blog. 

Just because it's about women doesn't mean that it's shuts out anyone else.  These are issues and subjects that effect all of us.  Not just one gender.  Not just one sex.  Both.  All.  Either.

So thanks again for your positive feedback and your encouraging remarks and your thoughtful statements, questions, and comments at the ends of these posts.  They mean a lot to all us gals who are perusing R.J.  This world needs guys who are tough enough to love.  Thanks.

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