Saturday, October 16, 2010


The last few days I've been listening to the radio as I drive.

Some days, I'm more interested in silence while driving, especially when the kids aren't with me.  I need that brief period of peace.

Other days when I'm alone I just want to be singing at the top of my lungs without anyone there to hear me.  Tons of freedom in the car.

These last few days have been more singing days and so the radio has been on.

Of course with the radio, no matter which station you listen to, you've got commercials.

There's this one commercial that's been making me insane.

In it, there are these two women who are out to lunch together or something, and the one woman says, "I feel like I'm still thirty, but when I look in the mirror I realize THAT'S not true!"  Then the other woman tells her that she can help!  All her friend needs to do is hook up with these local and affordable plastic surgeons and get some nips, tucks, and botox, and life will be all better.  Because "you should look the way you feel".

This bothers me with an intensity I can't even begin to express here.

So when I'm forty I should still look thirty?

How about when I'm sixty?

Or eighty?

Sorry to be a downer, but there comes a point at which a person should really NOT look thirty.  If you're eighty and you look thirty, you probably also look a bit creepy.

I wonder why it's so hard for people to accept how they look as they age.

I know.  People always tell me I have this great skin and I look so young and on and on.  And maybe that's true, but there ARE things I'm starting to notice.

I have horrifying dark circles under my eyes that don't want to go away.

My teenage acne is coming back since I stopped taking birth control pills.

I have ridiculous stretch marks from bearing my two children and a gut that just won't quit.

There are things about me that tweak at my heart a bit when I look in the mirror without my glasses on or think about how I look naked.

We've all got our issues with our bodies.

But I just can't be cool with plastic surgery to fix these things.

I think that there are things we can fix about ourselves.

For instance - I really should be getting more sleep.

Getting enough sleep would almost definitely help out with the dark circle issue.

And if I did a few more crunches (or ANY crunches, for that matter) I might be able to get rid of that last bit of baby weight.

If I filed my nails they might not look nasty and chipped and if I painted my toenails I might look more feminine.  HECK - I could even wear make-up if I wanted to!

But there's the plastic surgery thing that sort of sneaks into the back of our brains sometimes.

It's a scary thing, really.

You can alter your physique so much, if you want to, that you don't even look like you anymore: a whole new face.

Maybe to some this sounds good.  To me it sounds like a really scary movie.

The things that we try to fix with plastic surgery are usually things that either we could fix if we really worked hard or changed our habits (like my sleeping issue) or they are things we were born with that we have decided are not acceptable - like how my ears stick out from my head.

There are things that can be fixed that maybe need to be fixed for health reasons or so that we can see better or something that is growing somewhere that really shouldn't be there.  But then there are the things like my ears or something else's nose that are just things that make

It's taken me a long time to just accept my ears.  They still bug me sometimes.  Especially since I don't have hair to hide them anymore.  But God gave me these big stick out ears and that's okay.  And it's funny.  People who have these things that hate about themselves - their nose or their birth mark or their eyebrows or whatever - the funny thing is that other people either don't even notice them, or they think they're kind of cool..

Tons of famous actors and models have made their careers out of their strange facial features or physical differences that make them unique.  Blossom's nose, for example.

We forget that there is BEAUTY in the differences.

That God didn't make us all the same because that would've been BORING!  We're humans - we like to look at interesting things.  New things.  Cool things.  Funny things.  Pretty things.  Shiny things.  That's just how we're wired.  The color of someone's skin, the color of their eyes, their hair, the shape of their nose - these are things that add to the uniqueness of life - the beauty of life!

We come in all shapes and sizes.  Some girls have bigger boobs or smaller boobs or whatever.  That doesn't mean we need a boob job.  It just means that you might be able to wear a strapless dress and I might be able to run fast with nothing but an underwire - but we each have things we can do or not do or things that come more easily or are harder to come by.

I remember that TV show - The Swan.  Is it still on TV?  Gosh I hope not.

I never actually watched it, but people told me that they basically took "ugly" women and made them over and literally got them plastic surgery, and then they were "pretty" at the end.


That's great for the chick's self esteem.

"You're really ugly right now, but that's okay - we'll just cut off part of your face and replace it with some skin from somewhere else on your body and then you'll be beautiful."

Sorry.  That disgusts me.  It really does.

I know some of you might be reading this and you've had some kind of appearance altering surgery.  Heck - I still wear my retainer at night.  But the reason for this particular entry is just to say that some of those things that we feel like are these huge flaws are really things that make us so interesting and gorgeous!

If you've got one of those amazing Greek noses - why hide that?  Why change it?  It's so neat to those of us who don't have one!

And there are so many other things just like that.  Things that others might make fun of us for.  Others who are insecure about their own appearances.  Others who are too ignorant to see what's really beautiful about you.  Fact is - those people are just dumb.  Really.  They're dumb.  And I don't use words like that lightly.

If you're fifty and you feel thirty - awesome - keep doing whatever you're doing.  FEEL thirty.  Heck - feel sixteen!  Whatever - but be proud of your wrinkles and your greys.  Those things are battle scars!  Those things are honor badges!  Those things are jewels in your crown!

I got my copy of Whole Living magazine a few days ago and I've been reading about Wabi Sabi.

It's intensely cool.

It's basically about finding the beauty in real life.  In old stuff.  In normal, everyday stuff that we don't tend to think about a lot.  In clothes that are tattered and care worn and threadbare.  How that hole in your shirt isn't something to be ashamed of - it's what makes the shirt an original!

A whole new way to look at the world.

I think that Wabi Sabi is something that we should take very seriously as people.

Old age should not be something to dread, but something to cherish.  Those who are older than me are wiser.  Have EARNED their greys.  And gosh - grey hair is so beautiful!  I wish more women would let their hair be grey.  I just love all the shades it can be, the way the light hits it and it turns silver.  That's gorgeous stuff.

And crows feet.  I hope I have more crows feet than brow lines so I'll know I smiled more than I frowned in my past.  I have always loved crows feet on people older than me.  Signs of joy and hope.

Maybe those of you who are older than me are sitting back thinking I'm just being an idealist and I'm just young and I'll change my tune when I'm your age.  But just think.  I'm thirty.  That woman on the commerical said she FELT like she was thirty and wanted to LOOK that way again - but I AM thirty, and I ADMIRE how you look now.  I aspire to be so naturally lovely as you ladies who dare to wear your greys and opt out of plastic surgery to keep your face "radiant" or whatever.  The women who are weathered - those are the women who truly shine.  To me, they look as though they have truly LIVED.

And just to everyone reading...

If we looked like Barbie - not only would we be eight feet tall and have a spine that could not support the weight of our breasts - but it would be awfully hard to play touch football or splash in puddles or catch snow flakes on our tongues or skip rocks if our feet were shaped like we were wearing heels all the time.

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