Wednesday, December 10, 2008

Hazy Shade of Winter

Today is one of those days where it's really too warm to be December. Sickness hangs like fog over my family, over the area, over the friends around me.

I hate these days here. Humidity soars. It should be freezing outside. You look out the window and the wind is berating the trees, the sky is grey, dark clouds looming - but it's in the sixties when you check the thermometer. Hate it.

It's been interesting living life with a shaved head. I wonder what people are thinking when they look at me. Maybe I'm a cancer victim, or a lesbian, or maybe they think I'm just weird. Not sure. Most looks I get are negative in nature. Most people simply ask why I did it if they get up the nerve to talk to me. I guess I should be flattered to be a conversation piece, but I'd rather just be left alone.

To be honest, I'm not sure why I did it. I've just always wanted to. I felt like it would be freeing somehow. I felt like it would make me feel more like myself. And the truth is, it does. I like my hair this way. I like not having to mess with it in the morning, having to look in the mirror and be disgusted because I'm having a bad day or whatever. I like how it feels. I like that I'm saving $ on shampoo. God knows we all need to save a little cash right now.

I have this friend who has two cars. Not one for him and one for his fiance who lives with him. He has two cars that are his. They are the exact same make and model. The only difference is that one is red and one is black and I think maybe one is stick and one is automatic. So he just takes whichever one he feels like that day.

Now, I love this guy. He's one of my best friends and I hope we'll stay good friends til one of us kicks it, but I think that's nuts.

I don't want to have that much extra money. Just enough to go on the occasional backpack across Europe.

Either way, I don't want to feel like this anymore. Sick, I mean. I should drink some green tea or something instead of sitting in front of the computer blogging. There's something wrong with that. When you forgo breakfast and hydration to type a blog.

I guess most writers were certifiably insane. I shouldn't consider myself too special.

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